The Hot Russian Nurse

Yesterday, I took little J to the doctor. His ear infection had returned. Again. This fact is neither here nor there in relation to the events that transpired.

There was a new nurse. She called us back to the room, and I could tell from her accent that she was from somewhere in the Russia neighborhood. Being very uneducated about which country is which, I wisely asked her where she was from without mentioning Russia.

"Ukraine", she said.

J proceeded to be his little dominant self opening cabinets and drawers, crawling into a cabinet shelf that was 8 inches by 12 inches, actually fitting inside and then getting stuck. If only I had my camera handy. Continually I gave the boy instructions and as usual he ignored me. Not even a stern "come here" could break him out of his wanton reverie of distruction. It went down something like this:

Me: Stop climbing into the cabinets.

Hot Nurse: "Oh you are naughty boy. You listen to no one."

Me: Come here J so we can put you on the scale.

I heave J onto the infant scales, and he promptly turns it off.

Hot Nurse: "You are such naughty boy. Naughty naughty boy."

"Oh your eyes, I have never seen such eyes like these."

J turns off the scale one more time just for fun.

Hot Nurse: "You come back to Ukriane with me, yes, naughty boy?"

J continues to ignore her and go about his business of destroying everything he can get his hands on.

Hot Nurse: "You tell me bye bye?"

J thinking: destruction destruction destruction.

[Hot nurse exit right.]

Now I don't know about you, but if he had been older it might have been really disturbing. As it was, it was so funny, I laughed all the way home. And when he's a angst ridden angry teenager, I'm in luck! I'll just send him to hot nurse in the Ukraine. Dang it! I should have gotten her number.